About Emma
Emma Clarke is a leading female voiceover and comedy/drama writer. She voices all kinds of things from advertisements to radio identity packages – but is best known as the ‘voice of the London Underground’.
Previous postings
- Cutting edge discussion: how to say road names in a commercial
- Facing the nation on the telly – the key issues
- Unaccustomed as I am...
- Mind the Gap: The inside story of a very British fiasco
- Awkward Advertising: BT’s Adam and Jane ads
- Translate these phrases into actual English and you’ll win a prize!*
- Excuse me, would you like to rent my mouth?
- Awkward Advertising: John Prescott the boxer
- Awkward Advertising: JLS Wii Party
- Awkward Advertising: Nice ‘n’ Easy’s Dance class ad
- Awkward Advertising: The Boots ‘Not giving gifts this year’ ad
- Awkward Advertising: Halifax’s “ISA ISA Baby” TV ad
- Awkward Advertising: that bloody Match Affinity commercial
Archives
I am the Chlamydia voice of choice
Monday
Jul 7 2008
It’s official. I am ‘the Chlamydia voice of choice.’
Today one of my clients sent me ANOTHER ad about sexually transmitted diseases. I’m beginning to see a pattern. The client sent me an email: “I saw this script and thought of you,“ he wrote.
I’ll level with you, Reader: I’m not sure this is a compliment.
I challenged him.
“Why?” I asked. “Why did you think of me when you saw a Chlamydia ad?”
“It had you written all over it,“ he said. “Young, saucy, been about a bit…“
“What do you mean?” I demanded. “Been about a bit?”
“Well, let’s not beat about the bush,“ he said, “you’re a woman of the world.”
“I am so not!” I said, rather defensively. “I go to garden centres at weekends! I’m a member of The National Trust! I’m a fan of Time Team. I do not go clubbing, have one night stands, or get sexually transmitted diseases.”
“That might be the case,“ he said. “But you can sound as if you do.”
Here, I could see his point. When pressed, I can sound like a right smacked up slag.
“Could I do one about herpes?” I begged. “Just for a bit of variety?”
“No,“ he said. “You’re the Chlamydia girl. *Name of other female voiceover* is herpes. If you’re lucky we might have a domestic violence awareness ad later this week. You can do that. Keep your fingers crossed.”
3 comments · add a comment · this blog is moderated
Emma Clarke takes no responsibility for any comments below, as these do not necessarily represent her views.
Charles Reece II
09 July 2008 at
08:12
You forgot your own words from "I may look nothing like you imagine" I know a nasty tart to take the job if you won't=) This is icing on the cake for me as I found your website only today and yesterday you wrote this blog. Cheers from America!
Rich Sweetman
22 July 2008 at
06:03
Read all that, and totally agree with most of it....However, surely if you are the Chlamydia voice of choice, it moreover means that your voice is sexually off putting? Therefore you are the voice of reason, the voice that stops the kids catching stuff, maybe, dare i say, the voice that puts them off having sex?! You should be very proud. Single handedly/voicedly, you have managed to cut down the amount of teenage sexual health issues in this country.
Debbie Dillon
05 August 2008 at
01:56
Sorry - reading this item took me far too long. First I got waylaid by the rolling ads on the garden centre link. Then I read the whole of the sexually transmitted diseases thing. Love the kid in the supermarket ad. I've sooooooo been there....