Emma Clarke is a leading female voiceover and comedy/drama writer. She voices all kinds of things from advertisements to radio identity packages – but is best known as the ‘voice of the London Underground’.
- The creative challenge of Spotify
- Emma gets appy...by becoming a man
- “Could you stop doing that funny pause, please?”
- Cutting edge discussion: how to say road names in a commercial
- Facing the nation on the telly – the key issues
- Unaccustomed as I am...
- Mind the Gap: The inside story of a very British fiasco
- Awkward Advertising: BT’s Adam and Jane ads
- Translate these phrases into actual English and you’ll win a prize!*
- Excuse me, would you like to rent my mouth?
- Awkward Advertising: John Prescott the boxer
- Awkward Advertising: JLS Wii Party
- Awkward Advertising: Nice ‘n’ Easy’s Dance class ad
Other people’s conversations
Mar 23 2009
I’ll admit it, I’m nosey. As a child, my mother was always telling me not to stare at strangers. Now I’m all grown up, the staring has graduated into ‘people watching’ and I’ve perfected my technique to such a degree that I’ve only been threatened twice in the past year.
I love eavesdropping too. I was in a National Trust tea room on Saturday and heard the following, spoken by a well-dressed middle-aged lady with bifocals and a perm. She was chatting to a friend over a pot of tea and a flapjack.
“He was my decorator. I’d had HRT. Nature took its course,” she said. And in three simple phrases she’d given me characters, plot, subtext and a wonderful euphemism for a paste-splattered collision.
I could picture the decorator, all dungareed and paint-smudged descending his ladder with a brush in his pocket. And the woman, released from the tyranny of hot-flushes and arid genitals suddenly grasping undercoat in a whole new way.
It wasn’t quite in the same league as Hemingway’s brilliant ‘flash fiction’ six word short story (“For sale. Baby shoes. Never worn.”) but it comes close.
Reader, I nearly laughed out loud.
Which reminds me, I had a conversation with a woman a couple of weeks ago who used LOL as as actual word.
“Oh, that’s funny,“ she trilled. “LOL!!”
“I’m sorry?” I said.
“LOL,“ she said. “I’m indicating that I’m laughing out loud.”
“Oh,“ I said. “But I’m standing right in front of you. I can see you’re laughing and, Lord help us, everyone within half a mile knows you’re doing it loudly.”
I waited for her to introduce LMFAO or RAFL into the conversation but sadly, I was left wanting...
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Emma Clarke takes no responsibility for any comments below, as these do not necessarily represent her views.
The Paranoid Android
24 March 2009 at
To LOL out loud has an acronym of its own: LOLOL.
10 July 2009 at
hi again. inserting text speak into real world conversations? *puts head in hands* oh no! what an excressence. that's awful news that! lol! oops, not lol at all.
06 February 2010 at
it's actually ROFL not RAFL x]